ME-ditate: Healthy vs. Imbalanced

My life, like most people, has been filled with experiences that left me feeling confused, defeated, mentally-exhausted, and wondering why. Come to think of it, much of my life has been rooted in imbalanced meditation. A quick and easy definition of meditation is: awareness and focus. Well, I was born into hyper-awareness. Being a black girl leaves you with little choice in the matter. Let's start with BLACK: Hyper-awareness of myself. Over-awareness from others: Where I come from... How I talk... How's my hair...How I live... What's my fate... How I move... How I make decisions... How I carry on the weight of the world.

Next, there is GIRL: Uber-focus from myself and others: How I dress... How I look... How I walk... How I present... How I communicate... How I dress...How I shrink.... oh my!

What makes this imbalanced?

First, allowing these thoughts to consume me and dictate my actions is anchored in critical judgment. Furthermore, these crippling thoughts kept me out of the present moment. I was tipping the scale.

Eventually, most women like me take a look within. A deep dive. Either it scares them into submission of what they should be, or breaks them into who they really are. This shattering is not pretty. It is not cute. It is very uncomfortable.

In my breaking, I yearned for help to calm the anxious thoughts, pause the overthinking, and chill the endless chatter. Something that would help me refocus my mind, and experience the now, not what was or what will be. It was right there, in my hardest moment, healthy meditation found me.

Imagine tuning into your decisions and replacing your self judgment with breath.

Picture it, grounding your inner self in allowance versus fear of disobedience. Training your brain to see the beautiful stillness of you, just being. That is what healthy meditation looks like. A mind and body connecting to the present, without opinion. With love.

In meditation, we get deeply into our "So What" flow like Miles Davis. So what if time and space didn't move for me at their pace. Who cares if I am not their cup of tea? What's done has been done, what will come, will come. And just like that, in those tiny moments of healthy awareness and focus I was on my own flow, in my zone. I reserved the right to ME-ditate and it was medicine.

Now I help busy human bee-ings create the life giving practice in their lives. I help them take a moment and experience transformative moments of perspective and peace. When will you ME-ditate?

Here are some of the phrases and thoughts I rely on everyday to shape my life regardless of my circumstances:

"Everything is always working out for me."
"I have more than enough resources."
"I am getting better at _________ ."
"I am mastering ________."
"All is well, all the time."
"I feel good most of the time."
"Pure positive energy surrounds me."
"I am the path of least resistance."

Feel free to add them to your toolkit, no cost ;) To sum it all it up, you have much more agency over your outcomes than you may realize.

The most important thing to remember from this post is "Everything..." Nahhh... you say it!

If you are going to live in your head, at least make it comfortable.

For more insights like these, stay tuned.